I have always had a particular disdain for people who choose to waste their days waiting in line for the next consumerist bauble that corporations throw at us. Perhaps it’s because I’ve never truly understood this practice. What does it achieve? Is it to claim bragging rights? Is it some sort of experience that everyone must go through to be accepted? What kind of jobs do these people have that allow them to take days off to sit in a line?
So many questions, and me without a single fuck to give.
Indie filmmaker Casey Neistat took it upon himself to delve further into this cabalist subset of the “iWantitnow” generation in the short film above. I’m all for having brand loyalty, but this is just sheer lunacy. People are ready to sleep in plastic bags on the sidewalk to protect their place in line. There are actually couples who are willing to go through this process together. It’s likely that they met in a line for something just as asinine, like a self-indulgent coffee. The facepalm moment comes towards the end where people think Casey is delusional for thinking they would settle for anything less than the “gold” iPhone. However, the biggest tool in the video has to be the girl who corrects anyone sacrilegiously calls it “gold” instead of “champagne” colored. She must be a pleasure to wake up next to.
I think the creepiest part of the video comes towards the end. There is a ritualistic scene of Apple employees and hopeful customers bowing, praising and cheering as if they just resurrected Steve Jobs with the blood of an Android using virgin. The ending sums up the insanity perfectly, as does the song “Loser” playing the background.